A call goes something like this – “Gayle, my dog has bitten someone. Can you help us?” I respond with a few questions along the lines of how long they’ve had the dog and has it done this before. I’m becoming less shocked when I hear that they have had the dog for four years. It has been “a little” aggressive since they got it as a puppy. It didn’t seem like an issue until now.
Let’s break this down. If your dog has been aggressive for four years, in dog years – that’s 28 years! I know it doesn’t calculate exactly like that. But, why wait? I’ll say it another way – if your dog shows any signs of aggression, stop it! It’s much easier to correct when they haven’t done it long enough for it to become a behavioral pattern.
Behavioral issues can be dealt with and corrected; however, if it has escalated as they matured, it may not be an instantaneous transition. Chances are the dog now has a triggered response. A trainer will be able to work with you and your dog to change the behavior and give them a new response.
Don’t give up on the dog. If you are reading this and are wondering if it applies to that little aggression issue with your dog, do something about it. Call for a consultation or hire a trainer to show you what to do. Fewer dogs in shelters may be the result!
Since it’s an election year and all I was thinking about democracy in my home. I realized that there is a form of democracy at work. One description notes that in a democracy all members of the society have equal access to power (equal rights) and the second that all members enjoy universally recognized freedoms and liberties. The majority rule is another key aspect of a democracy.
So? Well, my relationship in the pack is democratic in that I treat everyone equally. Affection, in particular, is given to each the same. Appropriately, of course! They are all fed the same diet and at the same time. And, that’s where it ends because there is no equal access to power. They don’t all have the same freedoms and definitely the majority couldn’t rule, because I’d be odd-man-out for sure!
I never wanted to be a part of a dictatorship; however, like it or not, I think I have one. I’m a kind, loving dictator, but I am one, none the less. It sounds so much better to say Pack Leader, doesn’t it?
Don’t tell the dogs that this November, they don’t get to vote! =)
. . .but, I wanted a little lap dog. That’s like wanting a lap cat. There is nothing inherent in a dog’s size that MAKES them want to be a lap dog. I know a lot of Golden Retrievers, Pit Bulls, and Great Danes who are wonderfully, huge lap dogs. I also know lots of Yorkies and Maltese who will avoid your reach because they aren’t interested in always being nestled on your lap.
I imagine that there are a lot of little dogs released to shelters or going from home to home because they aren’t lap dogs. And, there are probably cats given away because they are considered too needy when what you wanted was an independent pet who didn’t care if you were around.
If you want a lap dog and yours doesn’t quite fit that characterization, relax and give it time. Don’t grab at them or chase them down. Let them be and when they come to you, praise them, but don’t reach out. Let them get close to you on their own.
If you keep grabbing at them they will approach with caution and stay just far enough away that you can’t possibly get them. Believe me, they learn very quickly that your next move will be an attempt to convince them that they really ARE a lap dog but haven’t yet experienced the joy of being smothered by you. If given time and patience, your dog may decide that being near you isn’t so bad.
The moral of the story – if you don’t have the dog you want, want the one you have!
What’s in a word to a dog? It’s not a lot different than what’s in a word to us. Words are powerful – however, what’s even more powerful is the intention and the thought behind the word. On more than one occasion, most of us have experienced a “look” from someone that put us in our place. It could also have been something as simple as a smile that allowed us to shift our thoughts in that second.
Some times I have to intervene with the interaction of dogs and have found that the word “chill” works nicely. The word chill in itself, may not hold value to the dogs, but given in a calm, firm voice, with the sincerity of my thought of “knock it off NOW.” and as my Dad used to say with an added – “and I don’t mean maybe” gets across quite well. Dogs don’t need all of the extra words and even just making a sound works. It’s your presence, state of mind, and intention when using it that matters.
This also applies to human communication, but somehow I think that at the end of the day, we’d all feel like there were so many important, valuable words left unsaid. Maybe we should give it a try – it might come in handy at times.
It’s one thing to be taught about pack behavior and how dogs show respect and it’s another to really observe the dynamic.
In being with my own ever-changing pack, I have watched as they demonstrate to each other who’s who and where they belong. With a little guidance from me, boundaries are clear.
From a local rescue, I brought home a little terrier mix. Breed isn’t important. He is about 4 or 5 years old. He’s timid but so wanted to be a part of what the other dogs were doing. Well, the only female at this point is herself only 10 months old. She is large for a puppy, and It’s already obvious that she is proud of her position in the family.
I introduce the new guy to everyone. There was a lot of showing of teeth by him as he cowered hoping that they’d have mercy on him. (Maybe that’s not his exact thought!) It took about two days before I noticed an obvious shift. The female was never aggressive with him but was certainly fascinated by his little size and looked as if to question why he was showing his teeth and snarling at her. I’m not sure if she was responding with “are you crazy, man?” or “hey, lighten up, I’m harmless.” She would try to engage him in play but that just scared him more.
As I sat and watched their interaction, the trust between them was shifting. After running around in the yard for awhile, the little guy walked over to the female and licked her lips. The sweet signs of a peaceful submission. I had to remember if they had had peanut butter that morning, because that will also cause a licking of the lips for an entirely different reason.
He licked her lips and she let him. Then, the other pup followed. What is this, a mutual admiration society? It’s peace in the kingdom is what it is.
There is more and more information being published regarding the positive effect of dogs (pets) on our lives. For us animal lovers, this isn’t a surprise but we seldom see it written as a statement of fact or based on scientific data.
As I mentioned in a previous post, they do give us a purpose outside of ourselves. Since they don’t grow up, become independent, and move away to college or a life on their own, they are a family member that is with us until passing.
We can learn so much from them and many know the wonder of benefiting from their tremendous impact on our lives. I came across an ezine, The Healing Power of Pets, which I’d like to share.
I have had several calls from clients who say that their dog growls and tries to bite people who reach to pet them. Then I find out that they are carrying their dogs because they are little. Stop that!
If you are concerned about the safety of your pup because someone unstable (be it dog or human) is approaching, then do what you feel is best. Otherwise, you are contributing to the very behavior that you are trying to correct.
By giving affection (holding) your dog as someone reaches toward them, you can be giving the message that if the dog responds aggressively, it’s okay or even good. They may also be attempting to protect you and again, you are letting them know that growling and snapping is acceptable.
Little dogs, fragile though they may seem, are still dogs. You knew I was going to say that. IT IS TRUE. It’s as important to instill confidence and to expect appropriate behavior from small dogs as it is from larger breeds.
Of course it’s okay to give affection, but only when the dog is in a calm state of mind.
One of my favorite quotes is “The beauty of AND versus the tyranny of OR.” How does this apply to our dogs?
We can lose a beloved pet AND have love for another. That’s the thing with LOVE – it doesn’t end. You can’t use it up and it never hurts. Loss hurts. Loss hurts AND love flows.
As I mentioned in my previous post, I miss Olive tremendously AND I have endless Love for Moby, Zoe, Mac, and. . .there’s Love for more.
I say this because whether we are experiencing the loss of a friend, family member, or pet, we can miss them AND live life as they would want us to. If they could give us permission, they would. Maybe they do and we don’t want to see it because we feel like we are dishonoring them.
It’s good to remember the power and freedom of living in the realm of AND.
As a dog trainer/behaviorist, and more importantly as a person who loves and respects all creatures, I have to be careful that I don’t assume that I KNOW dogs. There is currently a lot being said about the need for humans to be assertive pack leaders. That’s true.
What I’m concerned about is that whenever we decide that we KNOW something, we limit what the truth may be and consequently, we’re not open to other possibilities. The BIG difference – we’re humans and they’re dogs. We can study animals and how they live as a pack, but there’s no way we can understand everything as an absolute.
I met someone who said they had worked with dogs for 35 years. Oh. As she hesitated to pet my loving pup, she said that the glossy-eyed look of my dog was most likely an indicator of aggression. She couldn’t have been more wrong. In this case, it was because of depression (I don’t know what that would be in dog language). People live together for 50 years and never KNOW each other. Why do we expect that there would be just one way to know our dogs?
Dogs may be more predictable than humans, but I have learned to never assume that I KNOW all there is to know about dogs or their humans. There’s always room for learning, growth. . .oh, and love.
We need our dogs. I wonder if as humans we need to be needed. If we choose, we can learn a lot and gain a purpose outside of ourselves.
I knew that my dog needed me, but what I didn’t consider was how much her needing me was a part of my every day existence. She needed extra time for eating and she required a lot of special attention. I guess I was limited at times because of her. In those moments, I didn’t see it quite like that. She needed me.
She never complained. Dogs don’t. She never apologized either. She needed me. I would have chosen nothing else.
Until. . .I couldn’t help her any more. I couldn’t be happy enough to make her happy. I couldn’t empathize enough to heal her. I couldn’t get rid of the pain that was deep inside her.
I could let her need me for something far grander. A selfless gift of freedom from the fear that she carried in her. She needed me to give her wings. To free her from the physical realm to a place of peace. She would never be afraid again. She needed me now more than ever.
Today, I can sense her peace. I miss her needing me. I miss everything about her. Now, she needs me again. She needs me to celebrate the life we shared and to know that she is free. . .
